Ok... so there has been some super crazy happenings at home lately.... Dee left, Bubba left, then we got 2 more girls the same day Madi was adopted... Im going to refer to them as Kiki and Jay... they are 12 and 8. Then... on Wednesday, we got the girls' brother on an emergency basis becuase his last foster parents possibly hit him... he came with the clothes he was wearing and his coat.. and that was it. SO we had to do some emergency shopping for him and wrapping!!
AND... my computer crashed on Friday, so I havent had a chance to update anything.
Mikes taking the puter to his brothers on Sunday to try to fix it (PRAY.. haha!).
I cant wait to be able to show off pictures of our gorgeous new Madison! She looked so pretty on her adoption day!! :o)
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!
Friday, December 25, 2009
Thursday, December 17, 2009
PRAISE GOD.. SOME GOOD NEWS!!
Tomorrow @ 3:45
Our precious little girl with officially become:
MADISON CHRISTINE MATSON
Praise God... He came through just when we needed some good news... and with such a miracle!! Its so amazing... all the Glory must go to God!! Our paperwork is not 100% finished, and they were going to make us wait until Jan, but becuase it wasnt anything we could help, they pushed it through for tomorrow!!
YAY GOD!
Feeling a little lost...
I keep expecting to hear a lil man crying to let me know hes done sleeping and its time for cuddles.
I should be getting breakfast ready for him.
There is no lil boy laundry to do.. and since I finished all Madi's and ours on Tuesday, theres no laundry to do.
Becuase my wonderful mom was here yesterday, there isnt even anything to clean.
I could wrap presents, but I dont want to sort through the christmas presents to find Madi's... becuase inevitably, I will run into Bubba and Dee Dee's gifts that we havent had a chance to give to them yet. Ever?
Im just feeling a little lost. Im not sure what to do with myself. Maybe a nap will help me clear my head and find something to do. I already baked some tasty banana bread...
I should be getting breakfast ready for him.
There is no lil boy laundry to do.. and since I finished all Madi's and ours on Tuesday, theres no laundry to do.
Becuase my wonderful mom was here yesterday, there isnt even anything to clean.
I could wrap presents, but I dont want to sort through the christmas presents to find Madi's... becuase inevitably, I will run into Bubba and Dee Dee's gifts that we havent had a chance to give to them yet. Ever?
Im just feeling a little lost. Im not sure what to do with myself. Maybe a nap will help me clear my head and find something to do. I already baked some tasty banana bread...
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Bubba..
Our caseworker called and said the judge ordered Bubba home today. They wouldnt even allow her to testify. Our ONLY hope is now Dee Dee. She has an appt with an abuse specialist for them to try to get her to talk about the abuse with them...but its not until Jan 5th. So he will at least be with them till then.
We can not believe a judge would send a boy home to his abusive parents. Its simply ridiculous. Im so angry and sad... no, those words are to weak. Take those words times 1000 and thats about what I'm feeling.
I honestly feel like I can breathe.
We can not believe a judge would send a boy home to his abusive parents. Its simply ridiculous. Im so angry and sad... no, those words are to weak. Take those words times 1000 and thats about what I'm feeling.
I honestly feel like I can breathe.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Court Today
Court today... well, for lack of a better word, SUCKED.
We waited around for 3 hours only to walk into the room, sit for 5 mins and have our hearts brutally ripped from our chests.
Basically, the kids lawyer used a lot of legal mumbo jumbo and droned on for 3 mins about how the previous abuse allegations where unfounded and there were new allegations from Dee, but an investigation hasnt been opened. Then the lawyers for the parents said this has drug on forever (a whole 4 mos) and its time for them to come home now. The judge was all kinds of apologetic to the parents (what the heck?) and said your right, it has been to long, blah blah. SO there is a shelter hearing on Wed to determine if there home is suitable. Suitable for what... oh, nothin much, just for Bubba to return home. Thats the point in time when our hearts where ripped out. Judge still says Dad cant live there.. yeah right, cause they followed that last time, but bubba can go home. What crack are these people smoking? How is it ok to send a little boy home who was obviously neglected, and whose sister was s*xually abused? Oh man... I cant even get started.
THEN.. this is my fav... we stepped up to talk to the lawyer and guardium ad litum after they dismissed the parents and the lawyer listened, mostly, but the guardium... not at all. AND THEN, she left the room and went and got Dee, who was with our agency caseworker, and took her out to see her parents. The very same people that she was freaking out about becuase she didnt want to see them today and was assuared she wouldnt. She, of course, was happy, but when her dad picked her up, she began to shake, badly. Later when her new foster dad and mike and i came out she was still shakey and she told us she was shaking becuase her dad made her that way. I asked why, she said becuase Im scared. When our agency caseworker heard this, she went to tell the guardium, who basically said, yea right, i saw her react to her dad, she was happy to see him. She simply wouldnt listen to any of us. The caseworker was floored, she couldnt believe it!!!
Needless to say... we were FREAKING out. What could we do... what can we do??? Nothing. But wait. UGH.
So our AMAZING CASEWORKER, who was as upset about the idea of Alex going home as us, went to her supervisor and they talked about what to do. If nothing was done, they were going to have us all call childline and report stuff. But, at 8 tonight, she texted me to say that she would be testifing at the shelter hearing on wed and they opened an investigation and would probably be calling to talk to us about Dee's claims.
Im still freaking out. Still trying to hang on to the threads that seem to be holding this family together.
I was reminded of this song today in the car:
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait
I will move ahead, bold and confident
Takeing every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord
And trying to live by these words.
We waited around for 3 hours only to walk into the room, sit for 5 mins and have our hearts brutally ripped from our chests.
Basically, the kids lawyer used a lot of legal mumbo jumbo and droned on for 3 mins about how the previous abuse allegations where unfounded and there were new allegations from Dee, but an investigation hasnt been opened. Then the lawyers for the parents said this has drug on forever (a whole 4 mos) and its time for them to come home now. The judge was all kinds of apologetic to the parents (what the heck?) and said your right, it has been to long, blah blah. SO there is a shelter hearing on Wed to determine if there home is suitable. Suitable for what... oh, nothin much, just for Bubba to return home. Thats the point in time when our hearts where ripped out. Judge still says Dad cant live there.. yeah right, cause they followed that last time, but bubba can go home. What crack are these people smoking? How is it ok to send a little boy home who was obviously neglected, and whose sister was s*xually abused? Oh man... I cant even get started.
THEN.. this is my fav... we stepped up to talk to the lawyer and guardium ad litum after they dismissed the parents and the lawyer listened, mostly, but the guardium... not at all. AND THEN, she left the room and went and got Dee, who was with our agency caseworker, and took her out to see her parents. The very same people that she was freaking out about becuase she didnt want to see them today and was assuared she wouldnt. She, of course, was happy, but when her dad picked her up, she began to shake, badly. Later when her new foster dad and mike and i came out she was still shakey and she told us she was shaking becuase her dad made her that way. I asked why, she said becuase Im scared. When our agency caseworker heard this, she went to tell the guardium, who basically said, yea right, i saw her react to her dad, she was happy to see him. She simply wouldnt listen to any of us. The caseworker was floored, she couldnt believe it!!!
Needless to say... we were FREAKING out. What could we do... what can we do??? Nothing. But wait. UGH.
So our AMAZING CASEWORKER, who was as upset about the idea of Alex going home as us, went to her supervisor and they talked about what to do. If nothing was done, they were going to have us all call childline and report stuff. But, at 8 tonight, she texted me to say that she would be testifing at the shelter hearing on wed and they opened an investigation and would probably be calling to talk to us about Dee's claims.
Im still freaking out. Still trying to hang on to the threads that seem to be holding this family together.
I was reminded of this song today in the car:
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait
I will move ahead, bold and confident
Takeing every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord
And trying to live by these words.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Adjusting Again... and Court Tomorrow
We are adjusting... again. From one kid, to three, back to two. Madi had a hard time and was very moppy on Saturday... and then today displayed a lot of bad behaviors, and temper tantrums. Hoping tomorrow she can get back to some of that good behavior we have seen from her in the last 2 weeks. I was really thinking it was the begining of the end of the "Nasties" from her. The hissing, growling, yelling, screaming, frustrated jumping... we call that her "nasties". Heres to praying that tomorrow will be better than today!!!
And tomorrow is court for Bubba and Dee Dee. Dee's new foster dad is bringing her, so we will get to see her.. YAY! :o) We are praying that the KIDS best interests are first and foremost thought about... and not the parents. That the suspension of visits would stand and that they would somehow prove some of these s*xual abuse claims.
The kids county never asks kids to come to court, but Dee has to come, so we are really praying for her.. and for her not to have to answer any questions... especially so soon after moving into a new home!!
Thanks for the extra prayers!!!
And tomorrow is court for Bubba and Dee Dee. Dee's new foster dad is bringing her, so we will get to see her.. YAY! :o) We are praying that the KIDS best interests are first and foremost thought about... and not the parents. That the suspension of visits would stand and that they would somehow prove some of these s*xual abuse claims.
The kids county never asks kids to come to court, but Dee has to come, so we are really praying for her.. and for her not to have to answer any questions... especially so soon after moving into a new home!!
Thanks for the extra prayers!!!
Friday, December 11, 2009
Dee Dee is Gone
Well, after a whirlwind week of CRAZINESS.... Dee has left our home and family and went to live with a new family.
Things change everyday and sometimes a couple times a day all week with what was going to happen to her and Bubba. But the final decision was made on Thursday morning for her to leave that night. Thank GOD, He knew that just wasnt going to be best. Thursday at school she had the first seizure we have seen. It was a "staring" seizure, or an absence seizure, and last until the EMT gave her some meds in an IV. (Yea, they called the ambulance, and me and Dee Dee got our first ever ride in once!!!). We spent most of the afternoon/evening in the ER, so the county said with all that, she can stay until tomorrow. So we got to tell the girls last night.
Madi is a very happy, chipper, alLllllllllways "up" child. She doesnt like to show emotions, except anger, and usually cant name her emotions. Well, last night, a dam broke lose in her soul and she SOBBED and cried for a LONG time, for the first time EVER. She could hardly speak last night and this morning after it. She was simply devasted that she was losing yet another sister.
Dee Dee also cried and said she didnt want to go. She was scared and said she would miss us a lot. But we had a very nice talk and helped her to feel ok about it.
We are VERY sad that Dee will not be staying in this school too... her teachers and staff have been AMAZING to both girls. Today, we took Dee into school to say goodbye to everyone, and they reallllly showered her with love!!! Her teacher is one of the most amazing women I have ever seen. She loaded Dee up with books, erasers and stickers, and gave her a nice clifford dog. She also gave alex a clifford, and madi a clifford book. Since Dee Dee loves pretzels and wants them everyday at school for snack, she gave a GIANT bag of pretzels too!!!! Then, she did something so above and beyond, it truly made Mike and I speechless. She wrote us a $200 check to buy Dee and the other two some things. Amazing woman. Truly!!! She said she wanted to go buy Dee new sneakers, becuase Dee HATES the sneaker we bought her... they are too bulky for her and she got very angry at them when she tripped, but her teacher didnt have time, since it was kind of sudden! There were so many people who came to the office to shower her with love. If I had a medal for best school ever... it would go to this one.
So shes not with us. And it realllllly hurts. But God is in control. He's got this. So, with a bit of a heavy heart, I said goodbye to a kid who has potential to do great and big things, knowing that God loves her more than I ever, ever could!!
Things change everyday and sometimes a couple times a day all week with what was going to happen to her and Bubba. But the final decision was made on Thursday morning for her to leave that night. Thank GOD, He knew that just wasnt going to be best. Thursday at school she had the first seizure we have seen. It was a "staring" seizure, or an absence seizure, and last until the EMT gave her some meds in an IV. (Yea, they called the ambulance, and me and Dee Dee got our first ever ride in once!!!). We spent most of the afternoon/evening in the ER, so the county said with all that, she can stay until tomorrow. So we got to tell the girls last night.
Madi is a very happy, chipper, alLllllllllways "up" child. She doesnt like to show emotions, except anger, and usually cant name her emotions. Well, last night, a dam broke lose in her soul and she SOBBED and cried for a LONG time, for the first time EVER. She could hardly speak last night and this morning after it. She was simply devasted that she was losing yet another sister.
Dee Dee also cried and said she didnt want to go. She was scared and said she would miss us a lot. But we had a very nice talk and helped her to feel ok about it.
We are VERY sad that Dee will not be staying in this school too... her teachers and staff have been AMAZING to both girls. Today, we took Dee into school to say goodbye to everyone, and they reallllly showered her with love!!! Her teacher is one of the most amazing women I have ever seen. She loaded Dee up with books, erasers and stickers, and gave her a nice clifford dog. She also gave alex a clifford, and madi a clifford book. Since Dee Dee loves pretzels and wants them everyday at school for snack, she gave a GIANT bag of pretzels too!!!! Then, she did something so above and beyond, it truly made Mike and I speechless. She wrote us a $200 check to buy Dee and the other two some things. Amazing woman. Truly!!! She said she wanted to go buy Dee new sneakers, becuase Dee HATES the sneaker we bought her... they are too bulky for her and she got very angry at them when she tripped, but her teacher didnt have time, since it was kind of sudden! There were so many people who came to the office to shower her with love. If I had a medal for best school ever... it would go to this one.
So shes not with us. And it realllllly hurts. But God is in control. He's got this. So, with a bit of a heavy heart, I said goodbye to a kid who has potential to do great and big things, knowing that God loves her more than I ever, ever could!!
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